Jewels, Gems & Gunpowder

I would love to hear from you! Sharing Saturday with you.

A Jewel: Shamed, broken and alone — that’s how I entered my first marriage at 18 years old. Young and friegthened, scared and vulnerable. I had no one with me when I left my family. They’d marred me beyond recognition and I didn’t really care to know any of them any more. Oh, I stayed many years around the ghosts in my family until I found my way free.

I was a blank canvas given to a cruel man. What the next 17 years looked like I hid from everyone. I was horribly ashamed of how he treated me. On our wedding night he left me in the motel room for hours while he went to the bar. Seems silly now in retrospect because that may have been one of the kindest memories of him. He mistreated me in the grocery store, at the laundrymat, in front of family and anyone who happened by us. He didn’t care. He’d buy food for himself at a drive thru and give me nothing. I was so broken I didn’t know how to stand up for myself or my children and that shamed me more.

If you find yourself today in an abusive relationship — whether that’s a husband, a sister, a friend or wife, LEAVE. When you get to safety shift thru what’s happening. I tell you . . . when you sit next to an abuser you can never sort thru the rubble and find the truth.

Gem: I long and linger to learn something new each day. I stretch to become a better human being than I was yesterday. I reach for a love higher and deeper than anything I have ever known. I fail on my strides to learn but the beautiful thing about growth is that it still happens — even in the darkness.

Metaphorical Gunpowder: I’m hard on myself. I’m hold myself to a very high standard. Ethics matter to me. Love and forgivness matters to me. Whiskey and wine bring relief but nothing like the love from your child.

Please comment below by leaving your jewel, a gem or something you keep yourself free from with metaphorical gunpowder.

All love!

Posted in Tags: Healing Trauma abba, abuse, art, belief, bible, biblical, blog, book-review, Books, christian, christianity, convictions, discipline, faith, father, fiction, food, forgiveness, friendship, god, gunpowder, holy-spirit, inspiration, jesus, literature, love, peom, poetry, psalms-23, punishment, Reading, steady, thoughts, travel, writing

Published by Just Jesus, Jodie & B

I have the courage to tell my story to help others embrace theirs. View more posts

Originally published at http://thepedophilehuntress.com on October 26, 2024.