Bits ‘n B

2 min readApr 9, 2024

Each week on Tuesday we will answer an anonymous message received at or through DM. Sometimes, if a comment feels resonant, we will respond via Bits n’ Bs for a more public response.

You wrote, “But . . . When your abuser dies and his child perpetrates his deeds.”

First, we are sending big loves to that aching part the abuse left in you. We understand.

I cannot know your situation but I can know that abusers need to be confronted. I hope you confronted your abuser before he died. If you did, you’ll know how to confront the child. Confrontation is key in protection.

If you did not confront your abuser and now that legacy is alive in the abuser’s child, you need to do something that starts to disable those actions. It is the power of our words that breaks the silence. If you have not gone to the authorites, I would encouarge you to do so. If not for the crimes that were perpetrated against you, as a testimony to the crimes that may be done to another.

If this is a family member, tell the family. Whether they listen or not makes no difference, tell the family.

If this is someone outside of your inner circle, tell their inner circle of these misdeeds. Abusers hide and thrive in secrecy. Break the secrecy and you begin to dismantle the abuser’s power.

All love!

Originally published at on April 9, 2024.




We write openly about our very traumatic childhoods. Understanding. Understanding. Unquestionable understanding. That's the message God has for you always!